


Mickey & Ian VS the Multiverse

by tajn



Category: Shameless (US), The Riches
Genre: Alternate Reality, Alternate Universe, Blond Mickey, Crossover, Established Relationship, Fantasy, Humour, M/M, Magic, Multiverse, Noel fisher other acting jobs, The Riches - Freeform, mentions of gay bashing, universe - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-05-06
Updated: 2015-09-10
Packaged: 2018-03-29 07:01:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,787
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3886738
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tajn/pseuds/tajn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Mickey and Ian go to a pawn shop to make some money, the last thing they expect is for the universe to fuck with them and throw a dozen different Mickeys at Ian.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Mickey Fucks with the Universe.

Ian wakes up to the same thing that he had woken up to for the past 3 days. Mickey Milkovich and the sound a cat screaming fucking murder. Realizing that he isn’t going to be able to go back asleep, Ian flips the blankets off himself in such a way that Mickey doesn’t get exposed to the cool air; Ian has made that mistake before.

“I’m going to kill that fucking thing,” Mickey mumbles and grabs the blankets to try and dampen the sound and to cocoon himself into the warmth 

Ian rests a hand over the grumpy bundle and pulls out a cigarette with the other. Lighting it, he takes a small drag and waits for Mickey to wake up a bit more.

After a few minutes, Mickey shuffles under the blankets and is just about settled when the cat cries again. “fuck, I just wanna sleep,” Mickey’s voice can only be described as being a moan. But, he pulls the blankets down a bit and shuffles into a sitting position next to Ian. 

Wordlessly, Ian hands Mickey the cigarette. Mickey nods and takes a few puffs before sliding out of bed. Ian smiles when he sees that Mickey is still naked from the night before. Ian is too, but he’s glad that the nakedness is mutual. 

“We’re going to the pawn shop today,” Mickey states pulling on some underwear. 

“Why?” 

“You know fucking why,” Mickey says with his back turned to Ian. Mickey grabbed a shirt, took a sniff of it, and threw it on. 

“You buying me a ring?” Ian says with a smirk.

Mickey doesn’t even acknowledge what Ian has said and continues as if Ian hadn’t said a word. “We have to get money for your meds.” Mickey says pulling, the still naked Ian, in for a kiss. 

And Ian swears that Mickey was trying to do positive reinforcement on the topic of Ian’s disorder and the medication he needed to take. Because when ever they talked about it, Mickey would always have his arms wrapped around Ian, or give his soft kisses, or do anything that made Ian’s heart melt. It really wasn’t fair, but Ian allowed it. Just to have those little moments with Mickey. 

“I don’t need them right now,” Ian shrugged and tried to pull Mickey in for another kiss, but Mickey wasn’t having any distractions and he let Ian give him a short peck but before Ian could do anymore, Mickey was on the other side of the room. 

“Bullshit.” Mickey says throwing a pair of boxers at Ian, who reluctantly pulls them on. “We already talked about this and you fucking said you were going to try the meds if I stopped selling coke. And here we are, a week in, and I haven’t sold a gram but you haven’t taken a single pill cause you fucking flushed them.” 

“Sorry about that,” Ian says. Throwing out the pills had been in a haze of the wrong dose of drugs fucking with Ian’s brain. At the very least, Ian should have sold the drugs instead of flushing them.

“Nothing to apologize for if you start taking your fuckin pills.” Mickey shoves his legs into the cleanest pair of jeans he can find. 

“You don’t have to pay,” Ian says softly. “I can ask Clayton for some money.” 

“Shut the fuck up, Ian.” Mickey says grabbing a baseball cap off the dresser. “I take care of family” and Ian can’t help but smile at that. Mickey sees it and adds, “But you better be fucking ready in 5 minutes cause Milkovich’s ain’t afraid to kick their family’s ass,” and Mickey slams the bedroom door behind him. Leaving a smiling Ian to find his pants in the swamp of clothes that litter Mickey’s floor.

~_~ 

“Hey Mick,” Ian asks holding a large box of miscellaneous items from one of the moving van scams that Mickey had done in the beginning of the summer. 

“Yeah, Gallagher?” Mickey says keeping firm eyes locked on the doors of the bus. 

“Why the fuck are you wearing sunglasses and a baseball cap.” Ian asks and knows it has something to do with Mickey’s obsession with the door. 

“Maguires” Mickey says simply. 

“That’s why you looked like shit last week?” Ian says. “How many of them were there?”

“3 and a bat.” Mickey says pulling off the cap for a moment to run his hand through his hair and he quickly replaces it. “Said they would ‘bring out the whole clan’ next time.” Mickey shrugs but Ian remembers how Mickey looked last week. His face looked worse than when Terry had found out that Mickey was gay. Mickey’s nose was still a bit swollen from when he had stumbled in the house with blood pouring out of it. But the worst thing about the ordeal was how Mickey had refused to say anything about what had happened. 

“Fuck.” Ian says. What did you do to them?”

“They found out that I take it in the ass,” Mickey says lazily, “those fuckheads think that now Terry is in the clink, they can walk all over us Milkovich’s.” Mickey speaks as if it doesn’t mean anything. But Ian knows better. This had been one of Mickey’s biggest fears. Hell, it was one of Ian’s biggest fears, getting the shit kicked out of him for being gay. And to be honest, Ian was surprised that anyone hadn’t tried anything sooner. 

Mickey notices the look on Ian’s face and bumps Ian with his shoulder. When Ian looks, Mickey has pulled his glasses down like some B movie cop. “Don’t worry about it, Ian. Cause Iggy is bringing me something that will make the Maguires a little less homophobic,” 

“You going to scare the shit out of them,” Ian smirks. “Cause you know I’m in,”

“Fucking A,” Mickey says pulling his sunglasses back up his nose and sits just a bit closer to Ian. 

~_~

When Ian and Mickey get to the pawnshop, Ian hears a quiet sigh of relief from Mickey. The man at the counter watches the two of them with interest, on Ian’s box of stuff, and suspicion, on Mickey. When Mickey slides his sunglasses into his pants pocket, the man states, “hands out of pocket.” 

Mickey holds his hands up in mock surrender. “Alright, man. Just looking and shit,” 

Mickey and Ian have a system when pawning things. Ian sells the shit and Mickey fucks with all the shit in the store. The system has been time and tested. Ian had always been the best one to haggle with the shopkeeper due to his natural charisma and his brass balls when it came to money. While Mickey touching everything tended to make the transaction go all the quicker, due to the shop keeper wanting to get the duo out as fast as possible. Also Mickey didn’t have the patience to negotiate prices. And today is like any other time… at least at first. 

Ian walks up to the display case with a huge smile and gently places the cardboard box beside him. “Good afternoon,” 

“You selling?” The man asks with a thick Russian accent. 

“For the right price,” Ian says with a short laugh. 

“Stolen?” the man’s face is a statue. 

“Nope. My boyfriend and I are just selling some things to make some more room and to help with rent.” Ian says easily. Mentioning the fact that he was gay always seemed to sell the story better. 

The man looks behind Ian and his face is tinged in annoyance. Ian assumes that Mickey is doing his job.

“Okay we have two dvd players,” Ian says pulling both of them out of the box. 

“Two?” 

“The things you find in storage,” Ian shakes his head. 

The man takes a quick look at the dvd players, plugs them in, and places them back on the table. “30 dollars,” 

“Each?” Ian says already knowing the answer. 

“For both. I have lots of them and need no more. I am doing you a favor.” 

“Where the fuck are they then?” Mickey calls and cracks his knuckles. The man’s eyes widen at the fact that he has been caught in the lie and Ian has to choke back a laugh.

“I’m thinking 90,” Ian says.

“40.” The man counters. 

“70” Ian says.

“45.” 

“60 and we tell all our friends about the great ‘vibe’ in here,” Ian says internally rolling his eyes. 

The man pauses and takes a second look at the DVD player. “…Fine. I will get your money. Then you can sell more.” 

“That’s great,” Ian says with the grin still on his face until the man turns his back to get the money and to put the dvd players in the back of the store. 

“You totally could have gotten more,” Mickey says tinkering with some of the weirder things in the store. There were dozens on statues of strange figures lining the wall, and even more painting. But the really fucked up stuff were on the top shelf, that Mickey thankfully couldn’t reach, were jar of things. One of them was filled with, what Ian hoped were, prosthetic eyes, another had what looked like a lung, and there were way to many jars filled with hair. 

“I was getting him interested. If we hardball him too soon, the he won’t buy shit from us.” Ian said forcing his eyes away from the wall of oddity. 

“I know but fuck,” Mickey says shaking his head. “We need the money and those pills cost a shit ton. And since I ain’t selling coke-“ Mickey’s money rant dribbles off at the return of the storeowner. The worst thing to talk about in a pawnshop is about needing money. 

But still, Ian stomach goes tight. Mickey was stressed and Ian felt as if 90% of it was his fault. The money problems stemmed from him needing medication, the Maguire thing was because Ian had forced Mickey to come out, and hell, Ian probably did something to piss the cat off and that’s why it was always screaming in the morning. But Ian pushed those feelings aside and plastered on his best salesman grin. At the very least, Ian could help with the money issue. 

“Okay next we have a-“ Ian begins but is cut off by Mickey.

“What the fuck,” Mickey yells and Ian turns to see Mickey rubbing his eyes and pink dust all over his face and shirt.

“What the hell did you touch?” Ian laughs as Mickey blindly stumbles towards Ian.

“nothin…”

“Mick,” 

“I was looking at the fucking mirror statue and it jizzed powder at me.” Mickey hissed and the palms of his hands cradling his eyes. “It better not be fucking crack cause I ain’t getting addicted to that shit.” 

The man mumbles something in Russian. When Ian turns around, the man’s stone cold gaze has shattered into pure terror. “GET OUT!” the man screams, which startles both Mickey and Ian. 

“But what about our-” 

“GET THE FUCK OUT!” The man just screams again. And in less than 15 seconds, Ian is half way through the door with his hand firmly latched on Mickey’s wrist and the box under his other arm. 

“What the fuck,” Mickey says still blinded by the powder and Ian wordlessly pulls Mickey far enough so they can’t hear the man screaming in Russian at them. “That guy is fucking insane.” Mickey is still trying to wipe the pink powder out of his eyes. 

“Let’s wash that stuff off your face,” Ian says softly. He looks around and spots a coffee shop on the corner and they make their way towards it. When it is time to cross the street, Ian’s grip on Mickey tightens and Ian checks the road for what feels like a dozen times before crossing. And, of course, the whole time Mickey is complaining that he isn’t a kid. 

Ian pulls Mickey into the washroom and starts running the water. And Ian mumbles a quick ‘sorry’ before forcing Mickey’s head under the tap. At first Mickey struggles but then he gets the idea and starts splashing the water at his face. 

“Fuck, Gallagher,” Mickey says blinking the last of the powder from his eyes.

“Do your eyes hurt?” Ian says leaning in close to see if there is any noticeable damage in Mickey’s eyes

“Nah,” Mickey grabs some paper towels and dries his face. 

“You wanna get coffee, then?” Ian smirks and hopes that Mickey hadn’t realized that  
the pink powder was still everywhere. And now that it isn’t a threat to Mickey’s eyes, it is pretty damn hilarious. 

Mickey gives Ian a look, “I wanna go home and take a fucking shower.” 

“Come on Mick, let’s do something,” Ian says continuing to egg Mickey on.

“You want me prancing around like a pink fucking fairy,” Mickey said loudly. “Cause that’s what going to make the Maguires stop beating the shit out of me,” 

“Fine,” Ian says a bit disappointed but wholey understanding what Mickey is saying. 

“You know, Fire crotch, ” Mickey says catching up to Ian’s long strides. “You kinda stink.” 

“I do!?” Ian says his eyes widening. Ian lifts is arm and takes a short sniff. He doesn’t smell that bad. 

“Yeah, you’re disgusting.” Mickey says biting his lip. “You need a fucking shower, man.” 

“I do?” Ian says catching on. Ian’s eyes widen in mock horror. “But what if there isn’t enough hot water?” 

“Guess we just gotta take it together,” Mickey shrugs and runs a couple steps in front of Ian and Ian follows.

~_~

A 45-minute shower later, most of the pink powder is off Mickey. But to be fair, only about 10 of those minutes are of Mickey and Ian actually washing. Mickey is the first one out, leaving Ian for his last two minutes of scaling water, something that Mickey can’t handle but would never admit to it. 

When Ian opens the shower curtain, less for modesty and more for preventing water from dripping on the floor, he catches Mickey staring at himself in the mirror. “See something you like?” Ian asks grabbing a towel and drying is hair. “Because I do,” 

“I’m fucking blond?” Mickey squints at his appearance, not even hearing Ian’s comment. 

“No?” Ian grins and looks at the still very black haired Mickey in both the mirror and in person.

“No, look I’m fucking blond,” Mickey said pointing at himself in the mirror and then picking at a strip of his black hair and trying to look at it. “That pink shit dyed my hair goddamn blond,” 

“What the fuck are you talkin about Mick. You’re hair isn’t blond. Like, at all ” The smile fades. 

“You sure?” Mickey leans into the mirror to get a closer look.

Ian nods. 

“Fuck, that pink shit did have drugs in it,” Mickey says leaving the bathroom but glances in the mirror one more time and shakes his head disbelievingly. “Fucking blond.” 

“I think you would look pretty hot as a blond,” Ian says pinching Mickey’s ass.

Mickey turns around quickly and is so close to Ian that when Mickey talks their lips brush against each other “I’m not good enough?” Mickey says. 

“You should know the answer with my dick rubbing against your stomach,” Ian says. But before he can do anything, Mickey is stripping his way to the bedroom. Needless to say, Ian quickly follows. 

 

.


	2. Chapter 2

What wakes Ian up isn’t the sound of the shitty cat, but the sound of his boyfriend falling out of bed. 

“You alright, Mick?” Ian chuckles and rubs at the sleep in his eyes. Turning, Ian sees the blankets threatening to tumble onto the floor and Mickey’s foot is the only thing left on the bed. “You have a rough dream?” Ian asks with a sleepy smile.

What Ian expects Mickey to say is something along the lines of ‘fuck off’ or ‘you know how I like it”, depending on the dream. What he doesn’t expect is for Mickey to ask, “Where the hell am I?” 

With that question, Ian is instantly awake and peering over the edge of the bed, “Mickey did you hit your he-“ Ian stops mid sentence. He blinks his eyes a few times to make sure his eyes are seeing everything right. And they are. “Holy fuck” Ian says, “You have blond hair,” 

And on the floor is a very blond and very naked Mickey Milkovich, who is grabbing at the blankets trying to cover his groin. “Mind telling me where I am?” blond and pink-cheeked Mickey asks. 

“Your house?” Ian says as if it is a trick question, while trying to figure out when Mickey had the time to dye his hair.

“Are you with Dale?” Blonde Mickey eyeing the door and Ian swears that he can hear fear in Mickey’s voice. And that’s almost as strange as the blond hair. Almost.

“Who the fuck is Dale,” Ian says as the blonde Mickey searches Ian’s eyes for any trace of a lie but immediately relaxes when he finds nothing. “That pink powder had shit in it.” Ian says getting out of bed. Ian pretends not to notice when blond Mickey says ‘oh god’ and covers his eyes when he sees Ian pulling on a pair of boxers. “Damn it, Mickey. Why the fuck do you always have to touch shit?”

Blonde Mickey pauses. Then says, his voice sounds like it is diffusing a bomb, slow and carefully. “Why do you think my name’s Mickey?” 

And Ian’s head snaps towards Mickey,” Because that’s your name.” 

“No. It’s Cael.” Cael says quickly. “But why do you think I’m Mickey.” His voice is clear and has a quiet intensity. And frankly Ian has never heard his boyfriend talk like this before. “Do I look like him or something?” 

Ian’s eyes narrow. “Mickey this isn’t funny.”

“I’m not Mickey,” Cael says the stress is evident on his face and he is rubbing his hands through his blond hair. Ian freezes. 

“Where are your tattoos,” Ian barely whispers.

“My what?” Cael says, “I don’t-“

Ian grabs Cael’s hand and glares at his knuckles for a hard ten seconds. Then spits into his hand to try and remove whatever makeup is covering the ‘FUCK U-UP’ tattoos that Ian loves so much. Colouring his hair is one thing, but Mickey couldn’t have gotten his tattoos removed overnight (even if he wanted to). Ian rubs Cael’s knuckles until they are red but they are still bare. 

“What the fuck,” Ian mumbles. Then his eyes shoot up accusingly. “Who the fuck are you then?” 

“Cael. You?” he says not seeming to mind the repetition, which is so un-Mickey like it makes Ian’s stomach curdle. 

“Ian.” Ian says suddenly grabbing a pair of pants and realizing that this stranger has seen Ian naked. “So where the hell is Mickey?” 

“Man, I don’t even know where I am.” Cael says looking around and casually reaches for the closes pair of pants.

“Southside.” Ian turns to give the kid a bit of privacy. 

Cael responds with silence except for the faint rustling of pants being tugged on.

“Chicago.” Ian raises an eyebrow. When Ian turns around, Cael is standing and wearing pants.

Cael’s face drops at the information, “damn,” he mumbles and sits at the edge of the bed. 

“Take it your not from around here,” Ian says with a weak laugh.

“Louisiana.” Cael says cradling his head with the heels of his hands. 

“Fuck me,” Ian says. “You think Mickey’s in Louisiana?” 

“ How should I know?” Frustration is evident in Cael’s voice and Ian realizes that this isn’t only a Mickey and Ian problem. 

“Why not try calling your house!” Ian says with a smile so bright it’s as if he has solved the problem to world hunger. 

“Smartest thing you have said since I met you,” Cael says with a small grin and Ian realizes that this is the first time that Cael has smiled since Ian has woken up.

Ian throws his phone at Cael, who punches the number into the phone and holds it up to his hear expectantly. A few tense moments later, Cael pulls the phone away from his ear. He dials the number again, but much more carefully, and puts the phone back up to his ear. 

“The emergency phone isn’t working.” Cael says quietly. “Like it didn’t even ring. That isn’t supposed to happen. Shit.” Cael looks pale and it make Ian realized that he’s just a kid.

“We are going to figure this shit out.” Ian says throwing a shirt at Cael and smiles reassuringly. “But first we gotta figure out what shit we actually know,”

~_~

By the time Ian and Cael have gone over their respective stories, they have moved from the bedroom to the kitchen. Ian had started a pot of coffee and made a bit of toast and the two had settled at the kitchen table. It would have been awkward if not for the fact that they had such a pressing issue to attend to. Getting Mickey back and getting Cael home.

“Okay.” Cael says biting his lip in concentration. “So you were sleeping next to Mickey last night,” Cael says. And Ian nods in confirmation. “Then you wake up. I’m here, next to you naked.” Cael says finishing the summary of what Ian had told Cael.

“Yeah,” Ian says taking a long drink of coffee. 

“Well did you do anything?” Cael asks. Ian sheepishly grins and Cael’s face goes blank. “Not like that. I mean, did you do something different or did you do something to piss someone off,” 

“The pink shit!” Ian exclaims. Before adding, “thing about what me and Mickey did last night was a joke. You know to lighten the mood.” 

“Sure” Cael says raising his eyebrow like he knew how much Ian was bullshitting. The expression is so Mickey-esque. It pains Ian, that Cael could be so similar yet so fundamentally different from his boyfriend. “You mentioned ‘the pink stuff’ before but you need to give me a bit more to work with, Ian.” 

“Mickey,” Ian still feels strange about talking about Mickey in third person while his doppelganger is in the room, “Got covered in this pink powder yesterday, while we were at the pawn shop,” Ian explains. 

“Did you know the guy who worked at the shop?” 

“First time there. Me and Mick try not to go to the same place too many times. Raises too many questions.” 

“Right,” Cael nods, “And you’re sure that nobody is pissed at you?” 

“Maybe Sammi or Frank. But Sammi is in jail for trying to shoot Mickey and Frank is fucking useless,” Ian says. 

At the mention of the name Sammi, Cael’s face falls a bit and Ian is just about to ask when Cael says,“ And Sammi, she can’t do anything,” and Ian takes the hint not to talk about it, at least not now.

“No?” Ian says with his eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “Cael … what do you think happened?” Ian takes a bite of his toast.

“Might be a curse,” Cael says. 

Ian stops chewing. “A curse? 

“Yeah, my sister was messing around with one of my family’s old books a little while ago. She told me about a whole bunch of spells. And some of them sound a bit like this thing. Like changelings or something,” 

“Why the fuck does your family have a book on spells?” Ian asks.

“Cause, we’re travellers,” Cael says sitting up in his chair and waits for Ian to say something. 

“Oh,” Ian says dumbly. Then adds, “Nobody in my family can, um, preform curses. At least I think.” 

“So the pawn shop is our only bet?” Cael says.

“Looks like it.” 

“Then what are we still doing here?” Cael says heading towards the door. 

“Wait!” Ian calls grabbing the cap from the day before. 

“Mickey has black hair so-“ 

“We don’t raise suspicions. I got ya.” Cael says pulling the hat on. “Is that why you were freaking about the blond hair earlier?” Cael’s voice is teasing as he opens the door of the Milkovich house. 

“Sorry about that.” Ian shrugs and pulls the door shut behind him and not worrying about locking it, because who the hell is stupid enough to steal from the Milkovich’s. 

“Don’t worry about it.” Cael says and grins. “But I gotta ask, which you like more, Blond or black?”


	3. Chapter 3

The ride to the pawnshop had been comfortable. Ian and Cael had been doing some small talk and sometimes Ian would point out the landmarks of Chicago to Cael, most of which were smudges in the distance. It wasn’t until a couple stops before they needed to get off, did Ian’s worst-case scenario come true. And it came in the form of one Lip Gallagher.

“Aw shit,” Ian says slumping into his chair and hoping that his brother wouldn’t see him. But hiding bright orange hair and a tall muscular frame was a bit challenging. And it wasn’t a moment later when Lip made eye contact and was sitting next to Cael and Ian. “Hey Lip,” Ian says weakly and glancing over at Cael, who was staring at Lip analytically. “What you doing over here, bro?” Ian says putting emphasis on the ‘bro’. And when Ian glances over at Cael to see if he got it, Cael’s gaze was now on Ian and the expression was easily readable, ‘are you an idiot?” 

“Okay,” Lip says wearing the same look. “Mickey, could I get some weed off ya. I smoked all mine with fucking midterms,” 

Ian freezes not knowing how Cael would respond. When he turns to face him, Cael looks as relaxed as ever. “Me and Ian are collecting from a pawn shop today. If things get messy I don’t want the cops catching me with weed,” Cael says

“When did you care about the cops?” Lip says pulling the cigarette from behind his ear and putting it in mouth. 

“Don’t want Ian getting fucked over,” Cael shrugs. 

“That’s surprisingly sweet of you,” Lip notes and standing up as they came to the next stop

“ Whatever,” Cael says leaning back into the chair. 

“See you at home?” Ian calls.

“ Sure,” Lip says and turns back to look Cael, “text me about the weed.” And Lip, not expecting a response, is gone before Cael can respond.

“Dude, that was fucking smooth,” Ian says once the door close. “Lip’s like a genius and he had no clue,”

“I’ve had a lot of practice,” Cael says simply and the two ride in silence. 

 

~_~

Ian went into the pawnshop without any plan in place. If the man from yesterday was in, there was a good chance that he would try to kick Cael and him out. But the man was the only one who saw what happened besides Ian so that made him the best bet in figuring out what the fuck had happened.

“This the place?” Cael says pulling off the cap and rubbing his hand through his hair, much like Mickey had done the previous day. 

Ian sidesteps Cael and open the door and is greeted with the terrified scream, loud stomping, and a door slamming. And from behind the door, the man yelled “Get them the fuck out of my store,” leaving his petite blonde wife at the front of the store and she 

 

“Can I help you?” the woman asks his voice thick with the same Russian accent as the man from the day before.

“Maybe,” Cael says sticking the cap into his back pocket and looks around the shop.

“You’re husband might be able to help a bit more,” Ian says. “You see we had a bit of a situation yesterday with one of your statues.” 

“You were the ones who made me clean up the pink powder and make my husband act like pussy?” the woman says glancing between Cael and Ian.

“Yeah. He is.” Ian says simply. “Do you happen to know about the mirror statue” Ian says not really knowing which one it exactly was, due to Mickey being the one who fucked with it. 

“The one that swaps people,” Cael says trying to be helpful. 

“I do not know,” The woman says tapping her finger on her chin in pretend thought. “Maybe if I had something to spark memory.” 

Ian rolls his eyes, somewhat expecting this, and pulls out a twenty dollar bill. 

“I do not have a good memory,” the woman says grabbing the twenty on the table. 

“Goddamn it,” Ian pulls out another bill and throws it on the table. There goes the money from yesterday, Ian thinks bitterly. 

“The statue does not curse.” The woman says simply. “it is a gift to the worthy recipient.” The woman glances over at Cael and continues. “Makes it so other selves, fix a problem that the worthy could not.” 

“What the fuck does that even mean?” Ian asks. “Can Mickey get back?” 

“Will I be able to get home?” Cael adds.

“In terms you can understand, you” She points at Cael. “Fix Mickey’s problem. And you all go home. Simple.” 

“Bullshit.” Ian says. 

“And what do you mean by all?” Cael says.

But before either of them can ask anymore questions, Ian hears something. Loud stomping, a door slam open, and the shop owner reappears with a gun raised at the duo, “get the fuck out of my store!” He bellows.

“Shit,” Cael says already running out of the store and is quickly followed by Ian. 

“Hope you get the best out of it!” the woman calls smugly and then starts swearing at her husband in Russian.

~_~

“So what do you need me to do?” Cael asks and falls onto the bed exhausted. After running from the pawnshop owner, ridding a crowded ass bus, and the stress of never getting home over his head, Cael was a little more than just exhausted. And since the living room was occupied by Mandy and Lip, Cael and Ian had been forced to hide in the bedroom. 

“Excuse me?” Ian says mirroring Cael’s sentiment and tumbling onto the bed but paying close attention so that they were at least a few inches away from each other.

“The woman from the pawnshop said I had to do something for Mickey and since he isn’t here, I might as well ask you.” Cael huffs.

“What can you do?” Ian says.

“Not much I can’t do,” Cael says scratching his nose a bit smugly. “How bout money?” 

“Money?” Ian says, his tone light. “ You trying to say something about us?” 

“Come on dude,” Cael rolls his eyes. “I at least owe you 40 bucks for getting the intel.” 

“But isn’t money a bit too simple?”

“Money is never simple.” Cael says, “But even if money is not my ‘task’ or whatever. The least I can do is chip in while I’m around. And we might as well get it all in one night.” 

“What are you thinking?” Ian asks. Having a feeling that Cael isn’t taking about the old fashioned way of getting money.

And Ian proves to be correct. “We could do the old club deal,” Cael says standing up with a stretch. “Does Mickey have any ID’s that I could use?”

“A few.” Ian says. “but we can get in?” 

“How is a sixteen year old supposed to get in a club without a fake ID?” Cael asks looking at Ian like he’s stupid. 

“I’m not sixteen,”

“I figured that out.” Cael says rolling his eyes a bit. “but how am I going to get in the club?” 

“You’re sixteen?” Ian asks wide-eyed. “Holy shit.” 

“What, Mickey isn’t sixteen?” How old is he?” 

“You’re younger than me,” Ian said shaking his head. “Fuck, we are not going to deal with this now. What’s the ‘club deal’?” 

“Me and DiDi used to do it all the time. One persons the distractions while the other gets the money.” Crossing front of the bed and begins looking through the closet.

“Distraction?” Ian says smirking. “I think I can handle that,” He hadn’t danced in a few months, at least not professionally, but he was sure he could pull that skill from his tool bag for at least one night.

“Alright then I collect,” Cael nods. “That’s how it usually worked with me and my sis anyways,” 

“Collect? You can pick pocket?”

Cael just pulls out Ian’s wallet and throws it onto the bed and Ian’s eyes widen, which make Cael smirk. “You know any clubs around here?” Cael says pulling through Mickey’s clothes looking for something suitable for clubbing, because the stained tank top he was wearing obviously wouldn’t cut it. 

“A couple,” Ian says, “But only g-“ Ian cuts himself off realizing he didn’t even really know the kid. He could be a raging homophobic asshole and would try to beat the shit out of Ian. Although Ian thought that he wouldn’t have a problem at putting this kid in his place. Cael was nowhere near as scrappy as Mickey, which made his size a huge disadvantage. 

“Gay clubs?” Cael says with an amused smirk. “I wake up next to you naked, your naked, and that ‘joke’ you made earlier about what you and Mickey did last night? I’m not a dumbasss.” 

“And, you’re cool with it?” Ian says flexing a bit to try and make himself look a bit more intimidating 

“Do I have a choice?” “ Cael says pulling out a navy button down and he plays with the buttons until he is satisfied before pulling the dirt wife beater off and slipping the shirt on, “I’m kinda stuck here, in case you forgot. And my kid brother likes wearing dresses. I don’t judge nothing.” 

“Weird,” Ian says. 

“What the hell does that supposed to mean?” Cael says glaring at Ian. 

Ian’s eyes widen when he realizes what that may sound like. “No, that isn’t what I mean. It’s just that Mickey has a sibling that’s kinda the same.” 

“Oh.” Cael says nodding. “I guess that there are a couple of parallels between our lives then.” Cael adds non-chalant. 

“Yeah,” Ian says and the room goes awkward. Cael’s thinking about home and Ian is thinking about Mickey. 

So,” Cael says trying to break the awkwardness, “You wanna go make some kush?” Cael begins going a couple of warm up jumps as if he is getting ready for a run.

“Kush?” 

“Money. Forgot you were a buffer for a second, “ Cael shakes his head and pulls the baseball hat on before leaving the bedroom. 

“What the fuck is a buffer?” Ian says following behind Cael.


	4. "I'm Flexible"

Ian is surprised. The Plan is going surprisingly well. From his spot on the stage, Ian has a perfect vantage point and watches as Cael gracefully moves through the crowd. Pulling out wallets, the cash, and then dropping the wallets on the ground. 

From the number of people Cael has gotten to, Ian imagines that they have, at least, a couple hundred dollars. And on the floor surrounding him is at least 250. 

But then, out of the corner of his eye, Ian sees a man reach for his wallet to pay for his drink. He pats around his pockets, checking each on a dozen times before searching around him. “fuck,” Ian says still dancing. The man finally finds it on the floor and he opens it. The rage in his features radiate off him as he scans the crowd for whoever just stole his money. “fuck, fuck, fuck,” Ian jumps off the stage and collects the cash when the song finishes and searches for Cael. 

When Ian finds him, Cael is pocketing some cash and tossing yet another wallet onto the floor. “Done already?” Cael says with a smile. 

“Yeah we are.” Ian says glancing over at the man who is still angrily walking through the crowds. “People are getting suspicious. There’s one guy storming around the joint looking for his fucking money. We gotta leave.”

When Cael glances up, he momentarily pales and then grins widely. “Fuck, he saw me looking at him.” Cael says between clenched teeth. 

“Shit. I go left and you go right,” Ian says getting ready to bolt. 

“Too close just play along.” Cael says before slapping Ian on the chest and his features immediately lighten. “I can’t, Ian.” 

Ian quirks a brow until he realized that he can hear the angry man’s breathing. “Come on, Cael. For me?” 

 

“But dancing?” Cael says, “You’re the one with the body and the skills.” 

“Shut up, asshole.” Ian smiles. “You’re fucking crazy if you think no one wants to see you dance.” Ian turns around and faces the angry man. “What do you think? Should my boyfriend try dancing?” 

“I don’t fucking know,” the man says storming off and still looking for the thieves. 

“You got some brass balls there,” Cael says grinning. 

“Yeah well they’re about to fall the fuck off.” Ian says walking towards the door out of the club. “That was fucking terrifying.” 

A man wearing the same golden shorts as Ian saunters over with a huge grin on his face. “Hey Curtis, I overheard you talking with your boyfriend about him dancing and I pulled some strings,” 

“As much as I would love to see that, I don’t think he’s into it, Ray.” Ian shrugs. 

“Thanks though,” Cael says.

“Come on,” Ray playfully shoves Cael. “Ian’s right about people wanting to see you dance.. People love seeing the newbies all flustered and excited.” Ray gestured to the small stage. “And you get to keep all the tips cause your … money issues.” Ray eyes turn dangerous. 

“… I guess I could give it a shot,” Cael says.

“That’s the spirit!” Ray claps his hands. “I bet you’ll be a natural!”

“This cannot be fucking happening,” Ian watches as Cael jumps up onto the stage with ease and his hips start rolling with the beat. 

“Alright everyone lets give it up for our amateur, give him some love!” the DJ says and the crowd cheers and the dollar bills being thrown at the stage.

Ian watches in awe for a few minutes until the crowd started calling for more. Cael looks down bashfully and Ian is about to jump on stage to stop this. But then Cael’s smile becomes sly and he starts unbuttoning him shirt. 

“Holy shit,” Ian says as the crowd start getting louder and the bills are getting larger. 

Soon the shirt is off and flung into the crowd and Cael continues to dance and plays with the buttons of his pants. 

“I thought he was an amateur.” Ray says swiftly into Ian’s ear. 

“So did I.” Ian says. 

Cael has almost removed his pants when the song rolls to its end. He does a quick bow, collects the money, and jumps off stage all the while the crowd is asking for more.

“What the fuck, man” Ian says a bit breathlessly. He had never imagined he would even see Mickey strip like that outside of the bedroom. 

“What?” Cael smirks. “You jealous that I made more money than you?” Cael says and thumbs through the money. 

“One, that’s bullshit. I totally made more money than you and we can count when we get home. And two how the fuck can you dance like that?” 

“DiDi was usually the distraction but I’m flexible.” Cael grins. 

“I saw that,” Ian says wrapping an arm around Cael shoulder, which immediately deflects all the stares directed at Cael. “… There is no fucking way that you made more money than me.”

“Whoever made the most gets the bed then?” Cael says. 

 

~_~

“Fuck me,” Ian says as he throws the pillows and blanket onto the couch. 

“Not sorry,” 

“Fuck off,”

“That’s the plan.” Cael says leaning in the doorway. “It was nice meeting you by the way.”

“What?” Ian says filling with concern. Was the kid going to bolt during the night? 

“Well I don’t want to see you tomorrow. Kinda want to go home.”

“Right,” Ian sighs. The concern is replaced with relief yet somehow he still feels a bit empty.

“What, you going to miss me?” Cael says seeing the look on Ian’s face.

“I’m going to miss getting money with you,” Ian says. 

And Cael chuckles, “It’s great, huh.”

“Night Cael.” 

“Night Ian.” Cael says and closes the door behind him.

~_~

When Ian wakes up the next morning, he immediate goes into the bedroom to check the occupant. And Ian feels a rush of relief when he sees the familiar black hair but why the fuck is Mickey wearing an orange mask.

**Author's Note:**

> first multi chapter fic of the fandom (hopefully first of many).  
> let me know how i do?


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